Small Victories

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.... so you all love me even more right?

I'm just in a funk. It doesn't seem like there is anything worth writing about but we do have a few accomplishments.

Dani is doing MUCH better with school work though I have a small issue with the way that her teacher assesses her work. Mrs. W. puts smiley faces on papers that are good, and not so smiley faces on the other papers. She also marks everything in red pen whether it is right or not. A couple of weeks ago I was looking through Dani's classwork and I noticed that she didn't do so great on one page and she made the sad face herself. So, she has started to internalize her grades. E had a conference with Mrs. W. last week where they discussed that Dani seems to be very Right-brain oriented. I think that has something to do with her being left handed. I was that way in school too. She takes longer to get things done in class because she is paying too much attention to the details of her projects and she gets lost in her thoughts. Which isn't a bad thing, the teacher loves that, but she is falling behind in the class work which is frustrating for Mrs. W. and Dani. We have also determined that Dani has MAD recall skills. She came home from school last week and was telling us about the stories that her class wrote. She could remember which student told which story. She has about 20 kids in her class.

My counselor said that I needed to let E know that he had my endorsement to tell me whether he wanted to continue fertility treatments or not. He told me that he didn't want to hurt me and I told him that I didn't to continue if his heart wasn't in it. He said he wanted to stop. We are both tired and broken up over the past several years. I want to know what else there is in life for me. Once I let go of this pain and loss, then things will get better.

I have kept up with my workout schedule though I'm not getting in 6 workouts a week, only 5. I have lost considerable inches all over my body in the past 10 weeks but only 2 pounds.... on a good day. I have attributed this to PCOS and I resolved several weeks ago that I will most likely not ever lose weight, but that doesn't mean that I can't look good. And I'm starting to. It is liberating. I feel much more confident. I am almost into size 10. When the semester started I was a tight 14. I think that is amazing considering that I haven't had substantial weight loss. I am literally running my ass off.