I need some Zen

Well, I suppose no news is good news. I'm at the stage where I don't really feel anything except hungry and the urge to pee. I might be able to squeak through today without a nap. I've been using the morning to get caught up with my writing for Humanities. The past few weeks have been difficult to do homework that wasn't pressing because everytime I would start reading I would start to feel sick. Now, I think it is passed for the most part. Today, I should be 12 weeks. I have another appt. in 2 weeks. And we will go from there. Until then, I am trying to concentrate on school.

Statistics is kicking my ass. Everytime we have class he assigns homework which ends up being 4+ hours, usually 8, of my time. I am in class all day Monday and Wed. morning. When I finally get home I collapse. On Wed. evenings I have to go back to campus for another 2 hours or so for another class which usually assigns another 2-3 hours of homework. My other 2 classes are mostly taking notes, but they do have writing requirements both of which are due the last week of March. I haven't started the writing in my other class so I'm starting stress a little bit about it.

My sister who married a loser and has 2 kids with him has had some kind of break down because after 15 years and countless breakups they have broken up again. My mother went to the rescue and my sister is now in the psych ward. Though given her record with having people committed, I'm not sure what to read into that. My sister and I don't even talk. My family is so broken.

My stepdad called this weekend to tell me what had happened and alluded that I might want to call my mom since she was so upset. I told him that I can't talk about this situation. All it does is make me angry and I can't afford to get stressed about this. There is nothing I can do and even if I could I don't think I would want to go up there. I'm really angry that my sister continues to be in a relationship with that waste of a human life, and I can't stand him either.

So, that's what's new with me.

I'm (yak) here

Ultrasound today. Still alive. Feeling very sick. Have a great weekend.

And.......

...... with a collective sigh of relief; let's all exhale.

Perfect gummy bear with arms and legs (well, buds anyway), a head and body. Nice big yolk sac and a hormone producing cyst as a bonus. Oh, and a heartbeat!! It's ALIVE!!!

9 weeks by the calendar. Measuring 8 and 5 probably due to a late ovulation. I'll take it.

Still Waiting

You know, I tried to give the hospital the benefit of the doubt. I tried to have confience in their procedure. I tried really hard to keep my composure and with that at least I succeeded.

First. It would have been helpful to know that the Naval hospital was NOT actually on base. We lost about 15 minutes turning around and finding it.

Second. I check in and tell them my name. "Oh... tsk, tsk, we've been trying to call you ALL morning but didn't get a hold of you. The nurse scheduled for you called in sick." I said, 'Um...I've been home all day. What number were you calling?'. They only got the very last digit wrong. The dummy behind the counter said that she would try to get another nurse to order my bloodwork. Which at least I got. I think I lost 5 pounds during that process. 9 vials of blood.

Third. I tried to get an ultrasound. I sounded like a used car salesman. 'Who do I need to see to get an ultrasound today?' Didn't work. You can't get an ultrasound until you see a doctor. And have your bloodwork. And build your file/paperwork. And you have to be counseled on how to be pregnant. Like duh, did you know you had to eat food? And you have to take vitamins? And you have to try to be as stress free as possible? Ugh.

I must have caused enough of a fuss though. I get to go back tomorrow morning, with my completed paperwork in hand, attend their 'counseling' briefing, see a doctor, and get an ultrasound.

E took off the whole afternoon to go with me to advocate and it was worthless. So, now he is trying to fanagle taking tomorrow morning off. He doesn't want me to go through ultrasound alone. I love him.

Stressed? Who's stressed. I've only been off my medication for 3 weeks.

woohoo

I have never been so happy to vomit in my whole life. Of course I could have done without smashing my baby toe into the footboard after leaving the bathroom, but Yay! Puking!!