Try to Get Some Sleep

I had a school nightmare last night. I drempt (dreampt?) that I was taking my Economics final. My teacher uses those ScanTron sheets where you fill in the little circles for his answer sheet. Well, as I was taking my final, I was writing all of my answers on notebook paper instead. I think that my question sheet was covering the ScanTron sheet on my desk, so it didn't occur to me even use it. Well, when I was done with the test, I turned in my answer sheet to be graded. When I sat back down at my desk, I saw the ScanTron sheet and panicked. I raced back up to his desk and asked for my answer sheet back and I saw him looking at it. Then I noticed that I had totally messed up the numbering on my sheet, so all my answers were probably wrong. And I was really pissed because I currently have a 91.5% in the class and the only reason I am taking the final (in real life) is to try get at least an 82% on the test to give me an A in the course.

He wouldn't let me take the test back and transfer my answers even though there was 45 minutes of test time left. I started crying and berating him and throwing a tantrum. He decided that he would look at one answer on the test, and if I got it right, then he would 'work something out'. Well, the question he picked was correct and he gave me a C on the final. And I was livid going into the whole "I need and 82% to get an A" fit. He wouldn't budge. I was so angry.

You'd think that I would have had a nightmare about giving a speech naked because I have to give a PowerPoint presentation today, but no; I drempt (dreampt?) about screwing up one of the easiest finals ever. I can't wait until this semester is over.

Coincidently, Dani had a bad dream the other night. When I put her to bed last night she was a little anxious. I looked at her pillow and said, "Is that the side of your pillow you've been sleeping on?"

She looked at her pillow and said, "Yeah."

Then I said, "Well no wonder you had a bad dream, you've been sleeping on the wrong side!!! We just have to turn it over."

Her eyes lit up like she had just seen me invent sliced bread. That is something that my Mom did when we were little and it worked every time. I guess I learned something from her.

No nightmares from her last night.

I guess I forgot to check my pillow.

It Really Does Happen

The following is a courtesy email that I sent out to everyone in my address book about a recent IM exchange that I had. It's important enough that I wanted to let everyone else be aware as well. I worked really hard making sure the dialog was spaced right so I surely hope that Blogger does not eat it.

I'm going to send this to everyone in my address book. I don't know how current my address book is, but I'm going to give it a shot.

I'm sure that you have all seen the warnings aimed at women who are solicited online by 'innocent' sounding men who have hit rough times. They live/work in Africa. They need some money, or they need to have something sent to them from the States.

Well, if you are on any kind of instant messaging community, you know that there are random people that will message you. This has happened to me frequently and a few months ago just for the heck of it, I added one of these people to my friends list. We have chatted off and on several times and over that time he told me that he lives in Africa and was working toward an accounting degree and working for an accounting division in a company.

I had a feeling that things were not kosher and today, he proved me right. This is a copy of the IM chat that we had today. If you are approached by someone online to do a favor. Just say No.

BUZZ!!!Ted J. Sylvia: hey
Ted J. Sylvia has signed back in. (4/18/2007 2:51 PM)
Liv: I am actually here today!
Ted J. Sylvia: ok
Ted J. Sylvia: so sup...........
Ted J. Sylvia: what is wrong?
Liv: nothing's wrong... i'm just not always at my computer when people IM me
Ted J. Sylvia: ok...........
Ted J. Sylvia: how often do you browse on ur computer/>
Ted J. Sylvia: ?
Liv: i don't really browse.... i just usually check the same sites everyday
Ted J. Sylvia: what is the sites
Ted J. Sylvia: ?
Liv: i read blogs mostly.
Ted J. Sylvia: ok.... i understand u
Ted J. Sylvia: so how do you feel today?
Liv: fine. tired but fine
Ted J. Sylvia: i taught as well
Ted J. Sylvia: you sound so dizzy
Liv: i need a good drink and a good nap
Ted J. Sylvia: same ehre
Ted J. Sylvia: same here too cos i had been working since morning
Ted J. Sylvia: i want to discuss something with you
Liv: what would that be?
Ted J. Sylvia: HUMMNN not much
Ted J. Sylvia: u from which state?
Liv: Florida
Ted J. Sylvia: i want to buy some stuffs to my pen-friend
Ted J. Sylvia: i guess if you can help me to get them i will ask fedex to come arround and pick them up for me to the destination
Liv: what would it be that you would want?
Ted J. Sylvia: humm....... i want to buy 2laptops
Ted J. Sylvia: i will tell them to ship it to your address
Ted J. Sylvia: i will immediately sent for fedex courier service to pick it up for me
Ted J. Sylvia: u don't need to spent anything
Ted J. Sylvia: understand
Liv: i understand... i don't understand why they can't be sent to you
Ted J. Sylvia: you know i,m in Africa now..i think i told you last time that i was transfer to Africa
Ted J. Sylvia: to head one of our company the supply Petroleum
Ted J. Sylvia: so its somehow difficult for me to buy it directlt to my own address
Ted J. Sylvia: that is the procedure that will really work for me
Liv: actually, that is not what you told me that you were doing there.... so, I'm going to have to say no. Sorry.
Ted J. Sylvia: what do you mean????????
Ted J. Sylvia: is it possible for me to change my profession?
Ted J. Sylvia: i,m man of my words and i don't lie cos of friendship
Liv: you told me you were going to school for accounting
Ted J. Sylvia: oh..yeah
Ted J. Sylvia: thanks
Ted J. Sylvia: i had finally finished
Liv: i don't mind chatting with you, but I'm not going to accept deliveries for anyone.
Ted J. Sylvia: so they employed me immediately
Liv: i have to go get my daughter.
Ted J. Sylvia: Liv pls come down........
Ted J. Sylvia: you have to understand me better
Ted J. Sylvia: actually i told you last time that i,m studying account final year
Liv: just don't ask me to that sort of thing. i'll be back in a few minutes
Ted J. Sylvia: ohh i,m sorry about that
Ted J. Sylvia: but...... i,m really saying the truth..but seems lies in your sight
Ted J. Sylvia: anyway..... no problem if u decide not to help me out
Ted J. Sylvia: Anyway it might sound strange in your hear even thinking that i,m lying but is not like that, it a great pleasure to me when i got the appointment that i will have to lead the group of those people that we graduated together, i,m sorry that i didn't tell you when the whole things turn arround, you too don't even bother to mail me since then, I still like you so much, i,m sorry okay
Ted J. Sylvia: i don't ask for any help from you again, i just want to clear my conscience
Ted J. Sylvia: i want you to take me as i am
Liv: well, I also want you to understand my position. People in the states have been approached by people in Africa asking them to favors like accepting merchandise, sending money, cashing checks and have gotten themselves in a lot of trouble. I'm not saying that you are doing that, but I need to err on the side of caution. That's just my position.
Ted J. Sylvia: ooh that is good Liv
Ted J. Sylvia: you have to be conscious
Liv: exactly.
Ted J. Sylvia: u are always a wise woman, that ready to be recieve correction
Ted J. Sylvia: a good citizen that follow the law of the state
Ted J. Sylvia: hm.........lol
Ted J. Sylvia: that is not bad by me, i love that
Liv: I'm glad that you understand
Ted J. Sylvia: but u have to consider me too, that i,m not like that
Liv: I will take you at your word, because that is all that I have. But I am not going to put myself in a position that I don't feel comfortable with. I wouldn't even accept packages for the President of the US.
Ted J. Sylvia: ok
Ted J. Sylvia: thanks for your consideration
Liv: well, I hope that you are able to get your friend his computers.
Ted J. Sylvia: thanks so much, i will do all what i could
Ted J. Sylvia: thanks for your understand Liv, i promise i will not do anything to implicate your image
Ted J. Sylvia: cos you are already law abiding and good citizen
Liv: well, thanks for your confidence
Ted J. Sylvia: you are welcome

So, he didn't ask me for any favors the first few times that we chatted. He developed a 'friendship' first. He is currently asking me for my mailing information to send me a gift. I am graciously declining.

I just wanted all of you to know that the warning of fraud coming out of Africa are true.

Love to you all,
Liv

My Name is Liv.... and I am a Mom Snob

I think that I am a Mom Snob. It isn't something that am proud of; quite the opposite. I cannot help but judge other women's parenting practices. And I am not talking about whether moms let their kids eat Cheeri*s off the floor or not, Elle. I'm talking about in general, mothering techniques. Such as discipline, love, reasoning, scheduling... that sort of thing. The really important things.

Most moms will tell you that their kid's are the most beautiful that they have ever seen and they truly do believe it. It wasn't until I had Dani that I understood the fascination that a mother has for her child. While I do think that that she is beautiful, adorable, and perfect, I am not naive enough to think that she is 'the most' of anything. I think that she is an exceptional child and I tell her so frequently, but I also don't rave to all of my friends and family about her. For two reasons, I hate bragging, and she kinda really is better off in a lot of ways than my nieces, nephews and friend's children. In fact, there is only one friend that I socialize with regularly who I think is as good of a mom as me.

I have another friend here who routinely tells me the Hell that she is in with her 4 boys. She constantly berates them, and tries to medicate their family issues with stuff like bikes, scooters, toys, movies, games... it's infuriating. I happen to love her boys. Her youngest, melts my heart. And you know that shy face that a 9 month old baby gives you when they start to realize that they love you? He does that to me and I fall in love with him every time. I don't understand how she can be so frustrated all the time, but at the same time I do. She isn't an effective parent and it tears me apart. She has mentioned to me a couple of times that she would carry a baby for me in a heartbeat, but she would have a hard time giving it to me. She has also said that she would want to me to replace the vaginal reconstruction that she has had done, and her husband made some comment about surrogate mothers receiving money for their 'time'. The first couple of times that she mentioned it, I thought it was very sweet, but then she started giving all these conditions and it lost appeal quickly. It would no longer be a gift. Not one that I was seriously considering anyway.

My life has been sprinkled with these types of moms who feel that their children are a burden to them. And really, I don't expect them to understand my disgust for their points of view. Sadly, my own sisters are included in that group. My youngest sister had her first baby at the age of 15 which forced my mom into the mother role and now she and my niece have an unhealthy Grandmother/Granddauther relationship. They love each other, no doubt, but my sister doesn't fit into the equation. My other sister conceived my nephew when she was 20 and was mad because she couldn't party when she turned 21.

When I was in my first trimester with Dani, my youngest sister got pregnant again, and had an abortion.

My other sister went on to have another child with the father of her son. I swear.... if I had mob connections..... for the father, not my sister.

I guess my beef with moms isn't only their techniques as parents, but also the choices that they make. Selfish is the only thing that comes to mind. And I feel terrible for thinking that way about my friends and my family.

So that is my confession. I am a Mom Snob. And I'm not proud of it.

Getting Back on my Lame Horse

E and I are gearing up for another cycle. This month I am taking a combo. A pill (same one as last month) to help me ovulate and follicle stim injections. I'm going to throw a question to any of you who have gone this route, whether successful or not. I'm just curious as to what your experiences were good/bad and what I can expect.

I'm also wondering how you feel about Artificial Insemination. E and I were not considering it at first but now it has become a topic of discussion. Our insurance will not cover procedures to conceive that are not intercourse (gotta love anything financed by the government). So, AI, IUI, and IVF would have to be paid out of our pocket. There is no way that we can afford IVF. I'm not clear on what IUI is. Maybe it's the same thing as AI? I do know what AI is and that is what we are considering. It will only be a few hundred dollars and that is an amount that we could make work.

So, have any of you had any hangups on AI if it was an option for you? How did you do giving yourself injections? Is there anything else that I should know? What is IUI? (I'm too lazy to do research)